Mentorship Matters: How We Can Help the Next Generation Find Purpose

I've been coaching martial arts for as long as I can remember. I was assisting my instructor before I even earned my black belt, and I started running classes at fourteen. At seventeen, I opened my first martial arts studio in the basement of a seedy pawn shop in Ogden, Utah. Coaching young people is simply what I do.

Over the years, I've encountered countless young men and women with talent, drive, and resources. I've also seen students without any of these qualities grow into confident, self-assured individuals who genuinely impressed me. But recently, I've noticed something different—a new type of student: the apathetic.

A Growing Epidemic of Disengagement

I'm seeing this more and more, especially among young men. Even my own child seems unable to get excited about anything. These students appear to be more than lost—they simply have no interest in the business of living. I myself wandered without direction for much of my early adult life, and while I felt like I spent a lot of time spinning my wheels, at least they were spinning. This new generation seems to have lost even the energy to be aimless.

I'm not the only one noticing this trend. I recently listened to an episode of The Art of Manliness podcast where a therapist described seeing similar young people showing up in his office more and more. The problem seems to affect our young men even more acutely, driven by factors like an uncertain future regarding education and job prospects, and the cultural messaging that has, at times, made men feel villainized simply for being men—particularly in the wake of the #MeToo movement.

I understand that as men, we've been given a lot of privilege. I myself benefit from being born a white man in America. While I started far behind many finish lines, the opportunities available to me have always felt accessible. I can see how our young people feel that the future previous generations were promised is no longer a certainty for any of us. I genuinely relate to these apathetic young men and women. I often ask myself: Why am I trying so hard?

The Power of Mentorship

What I found most compelling about that podcast interview was the therapist's prescription: we need to find ways to mentor young people. We need to show them how to interact in society without the shield of a screen. We need to provide spaces for them to fail safely. Some examples I really appreciated were teaching them how to write a resume, how to choose a job and interview successfully, and how to navigate professional environments—not just handing them opportunities without effort.

I liked this idea not only because it speaks to work I'm already doing, but because I feel that meaningful mentorship—especially older men coaching young men—has become somewhat taboo. This is thanks in no small part to the heavily publicized failures of institutions like the Catholic Church and the Boy Scouts of America to protect young people from predators. While those failures are real and serious, I believe strongly that we need to be comfortable again with older men guiding and mentoring our young people, especially our young men.

Creating Space for Good Role Models

The next generation needs us to be okay with giving our sons and daughters good role models, even if that role model might be an older, single man simply looking for an opportunity to serve his community. This approach will not only help our recent graduates find some connection to society, but it will also show the next generation that people like them can be trusted to give back and feel excited about participating in their communities.

We need mentors. We need guides. We need adults willing to invest their time and energy in showing young people how to navigate the world with purpose and confidence. The alternative—a generation adrift without direction—is simply too important to ignore.